About a year ago, around the summer solstice, a Sister took me to my first women circle. I was asked to share with the group what it meant for me to be Women. I was stunt to realise that no answers came to my mind… And I was not the only one in the group lacking insights on the subject!
Tears came to my eyes and ran down my cheeks… It took me by surprise for I usually was an expert at controlling my emotions and hiding my feelings… What was happening to me ? How could such a simple question could shake my so strong build protections ?
I had worked so hard suppressing my feelings, illusioning myself thinking I was in control, of myself, of my life, of my emotions. I had been raised to be a strong women, tough enough to fight equal to equal with men in this highly competitive world. I have been taught to be independent, to handle myself, that vulnerability and softness was a weakness. And at that time I really though I was doing great, feeling accomplished.
Although… I always felt an underlying anxiety… I was aware there was a tiny little crack on my fortress wall… I had the feeling that someday that crack would burst open and I had no ideas what would come crashing down!
That day had come. I had been asked a very simple question “what it is for you to be a women”, but my inability to answer acted on me like an earthquake shaking all my foundations.
The crack became a breach, through which She found her way to me. My Inner Goddess was quietly waiting behind the walls. There she saw an opening for I had finally put my guard down.
That was actually the first time I officially met my Inner Goddess, the source of my feminine power and wisdom . Oh of course she has been here all along ! My eyes were just not wide enough to see her beauty and grace in all that was surrounding me. My ears too distracted by outside noises to hear her soft and wise guiding voice inspiring me and guiding me. My body too attracted to external pleasures to feel her loving and protecting arms wrapped around me.
I knew right then that my life would never be the same.
I had started walking the Path of the Goddess, the Path of loving transformation and enlightenment, the Path of Sacred Feminism.