Tag Archives: feminism

You are not too much. You were not brought here for easy. You are here for so much more.

“Life is complicated. I am tired of hiding.”

“Why are you hiding?”

“Because I’m ‘too much’ girl.”

“Oh, I know that story all too well.”

“I just had a long-distance lover dump me because I’m too much. And it hurts. Fuck it. No more.”

Listen to me. Right now.

You are right. Fuck it. No more. Never again.

You are not too much. You have never been too much. You will never be too much.

The very idea is preposterous. Because you were born to be you. All of you. Not a tiny acceptable sliver. Not a watered down version with colors dulled and edges softened.

No. You were meant to be every last pulsing-bleeding-loving-crying-feeling bit.

And if someone tells you that you are too much for them, the only truth you need to remember is this:

It is highly likely that they are not now, and never could have been, near enough for you.

Because you, my girl, are the sun and the moon and the stars. You are the force that pulls the tides. You are the unrestrained howl under a wide-open moon. You are the essence of what it is to dance into ecstasy. You are the heat and the sex and the sweat and the burn and soft and the grace and the grit and the ocean of tears.

You are all of everything.

You are the mother of us all and the daughter of the Universe.

You walk through shadows and light.

You burn down and rise up and hold captive the pulse of the world.

You make the gods tremble.

And that, my dear, is bound to make some people crazy uncomfortable. It will make them pull back and push away. Because the way you dance with your shadows and your steadfast commitment to your light will push them into spaces that are fascinating and compelling and utterly terrifying.

Your very being asks them to step into places they may not be near ready to visit, let alone stay.

Because like the depths of the ocean that calls you home, you will never be easy.

But darling, you were not brought here for easy. You are here for so much more.

Because you are a boundary-pusher.

You’re a truth-seeker. 

You’re temptation and seduction and heat. 

You’re a mirror and a sorcerer, and inside you swirls the power of the ancients.

So no, you are not easy.

But in the space of that truth, please also know this. Do not get this confused with the notion that you do not deserve the deepest ease.

Don’t, for a minute, let them convince you that you will not know the grace of a lover who does not require that you constantly translate yourself or diminish yourself or quiet your storm or tone down your extravagant love.

Because that, my girl, is bullshit.

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And so while you are waiting, I want you to do this. For me, and for every last too much girl out there.

You take all that too much and you channel it. You gather every last ember of your too much broken heart and you light that flame. And in doing so you will call forth the others and sing the song that brings us home.

And then you — in your infinite, perfect too-muchness — unleash it all on the world. And you go and love too much and you cry too much and you swear too much. Fall in love too fast and get sad too often and laugh too loudly and demand with clarity the exact terms of your own desired existence.

Don’t you dare consider doing anything but that.

Because we need you. Every one of us, man or woman, who has been called too much. You are our reminder, in the most desperate of moment, that we are exactly as we should be.

Every last too-much bit.

Jeanette Blanc

The Path to Ourselves, to our Inner Beloved

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You’re forever forging the path in and in,

 searching for your inner Beloved.

 Her embrace has been so sweet, and yet so fleeting.

 So scintillating, and yet so safe, so sacred.

 Now you won’t stop. You won’t EVER stop–

 Until you can surrender in Her arms just. Once. More.

 Some days the path before you is clear and wide. It’s easy to see: this way! Not that!

Most days, though, you stumble. This path is not easy. It’s never been tread before. It’s yours, and no one else’s.

You doubt each decision along the many forks in the trail. “I must be lost,” you say every time. You battle with the rain, the fog, the bramble that cuts your face as you fight for a clearing.

Some nights you laugh with gratitude under the stars. Others you collapse in exhaustion. Many nights you cry, feeling unsure, alone, and forgotten.

 And still, some wise place inside you shouts: “Don’t give up! Don’t fall asleep!

Don’t settle!”

So you journey on, trying to find your way Home. Unwilling to stop until you walk for and as your True Self.

By Sarah Avent Stover

A wild woman is not a girlfriend…

A wild woman is not a girlfriend… 

“Can you trust me, even though you cannot tame me? Can you love me, even though I am all that you fear and admire? Are you afraid to step into me?

If you want to be safe, go back to your tiny room — the night sky is not for you.If you want to be torn apart, come in. Be broken open and devoured. Be set ablaze in my fire.

I will not leave you as you have come: well dressed, in finely-threaded sweaters that keep out the cold. I will leave you naked and biting.

There is nothing in you that can scare me. Nothing in you I will not use to make you great.

I will plant pear trees in the wake of your disaster. I will see to it that you shall rise again.”

As women we should midwife each other – inspired by the reading of Red Tent –

Nowadays we all witness women around us that are going through rough patches. As individuals, we are all facing major challenges in our life. It sometime feels like one after another, and you are just praying for a minute to catch your breath. You sometime don’t have time to enjoy the relieve that comes from having overcome a major obstacle in your life. A weight you have been dragging for years is finally lifted off of your shoulders, and taaadaaaa you find a new challenge right there on your path smiling at you: so ready to deal with me now ??

I just finished reading The Red Tent by Anita Diamant. It’s been said that The Red Tent is what the Bible might have been written by God’s daughters, instead of her sons. I don’t know much about the Bible, but I’ll tell how this book has inspired me.

It is a story about sorority. Dinah,  daughter of Jacob, is telling the long-lost story of women, because “the chain connecting mother to daughter  was broken and the word passed to the keeping of men, who had no way of knowing”.

In the red tent where women gathered every dark moon were shared the secret of blood, the healing blood of the moon’s birth.

“In the red tent, where days pass like a gentle stream, as the gift of the blood courses through us, cleansing the body of last month’s death, preparing the body to receive the new month’s life, women give thanks – for repose and restoration, for the knowledge that life comes from between our legs, and that life costs blood.”

I am so grateful for the inspiration. This book really touched my heart…Tears rolled down my cheeks several times while reading it, as I was really feeling connected to the hardship and suffering of those women, like it all happened through me as well. So much so that it made me wonder:  Are we all women connected ? How can I sometime feel other women suffering in my very bones, be it women from the present or past generation. When a woman open her heart and pour her feelings into the world, I feel like I myself went through it all hand in hand with her.

Reading this book made me also wonder : is life really easier for women at present ? Oh I know that past generation of women have accomplished so much in term of women emancipation to promote their rights and gender equality. As any women I honor their courage and am grateful for the life they offered us. There is still a lot to be accomplished on that front, especially in some countries. But all in all, we can safely say that life conditions for women have improved much over the past decades, especially in the western world.

So I wonder… Why do I often feel longing to go back to ancient times, like at Dinah time in this very book, when women were not always allowed to choose who they wed, spend most of their life working the fields, cooking, and serving the men of the family, not even being allowed to share diner with men ?

I believe that is because being liberated from the ancient ways, we women started living according to the masculine model of individualism.

Indeed, we women stopped living in communities, helping and supporting each others, gathering in the red tent once a month to take care of each other.

I believe that as women we were meant to midwife each other, to ease our pains, share our burdens and wisdom and guide each other toward acceptation and joy. We  were meant to gather inside the folds of the red tent to brush each others’ hair, massage each others’ feet, to wait, listen, rest, cry, bleed and belly laugh with one another.

Oh sure, today our burdens might not be as heavy as it were before. But today we carry those burdens mostly alone. Living the masculine way has isolated us from our Sisters.

So I encourage you Sisters to remember the old ways, to reach out to each other. Let go of the belief that asking for help makes you weak (that’s a tough one for me!)

You are not meant to travel this road alone !! So be there for one other. Hold hands. Create safe spaces where you can meet with women of your community. Gather inside the folds of the red tent…

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For more on red tents :

ALisa Starkweather – Red Tent Temple Movement
Isadora Leindenfrost film – “Things we don’t talk about”
DeAnna L’am – Red Tent in every neighborhood

The day I started walking the Path of Sacred Feminism…

About a year ago, around the summer solstice, a Sister took me to my first women circle.  I was asked to share with the group what it meant for me to be Women. I was stunt to realise that no answers came to my mind… And I was not the only one in the group lacking insights on the subject!

Tears came to my eyes and ran down my cheeks… It took me by surprise for I usually was an expert at controlling my emotions and hiding my feelings… What was happening to me ? How could such a simple question could shake my so strong build protections ?

I had worked so hard suppressing my feelings, illusioning myself thinking I was in control, of myself, of my life, of my emotions. I had been raised to be a strong women, tough enough to fight equal to equal with men in this highly competitive world. I have been taught to be independent, to handle myself, that vulnerability and softness was a weakness. And at that time I really though I was doing great, feeling accomplished.

Although… I always felt an underlying anxiety… I was aware there was a tiny little crack on my fortress wall… I had the feeling that someday that crack would burst open and I had no ideas what would come crashing down!

That day had come. I had been asked a very simple question “what it is for you to be a women”, but my inability to answer acted on me like an earthquake shaking all my foundations.

The crack became a breach, through which She found her way to me. My Inner Goddess was quietly waiting behind the walls. There she saw an opening for I had finally put my guard down.

That was actually the first time I officially met my Inner Goddess, the source of my feminine power and wisdom . Oh of course she has been here all along ! My eyes were just not wide enough to see her beauty and grace in all that was surrounding me. My ears too distracted by outside noises to hear her soft and wise guiding voice inspiring me and guiding me. My body too attracted to external pleasures to feel her loving and protecting arms wrapped around me.

I knew right then that my life would never be the same.

I had started walking the Path of the Goddess, the Path of loving transformation and enlightenment, the Path of Sacred Feminism.